Dating errors – we all make them. Some of us may be guiltier than others but the truth is that we sometimes can get the wrong idea about a relationship through miscommunication, misunderstanding and just general mistakes.
While a lot of the time this isn’t terrible, there can be some occasions where it leads to you staying in a toxic relationship or not going after what you want.
Therefore, to help dispel some of the myths that are floating around the dating world, here are some of the most common dating misconceptions.
1. Time heals all
Time does heal a great deal however when there has been an event in the relationship that results in a lack of trust, it can sometimes be hard to move on. While time is perhaps the best answer as you have to rely on your partner building back your trust over time, you also have to know when enough is enough. If a great deal of time has passed and you know that you are not finding it any easier to rely on your other half then you have to be brave and say enough is enough.
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2. Good things come to those who wait
While it might be easier to tell ourselves this when we feel like we have been consistently trying at something without reaping the rewards, this does not apply to dating. Sure, if you feel like you’ve been bouncing from relationship to relationship and finally are realising that actually taking a step back will help you find your ‘one’ then this saying works just fine.
However, don’t use it as an excuse to not put yourself out there. You will only meet people by going out, trying new things, socialising and being open – nothing came to the person who sat at home waiting for it to come to them.
3. It’ll be okay because we are meant to be together
Sometimes, when you love someone so much you find it easy to look past their misgivings and tell yourself that everything will work out because it has to, you can’t see a future without your partner. However, if things are tough all the time then maybe this is a sign that you just weren’t meant to be. You can’t rely on the universe to make things right within your relationship.
4. We should be doing xyz rough xyz times a week
We are a society that not only loves statistics but who loves comparing our statistics with others. While having measurable results is great for work or health, it is not so beneficial relationship.
Stop reading articles that say couples should be doing a certain thing or seeing each other a certain amount of times a week and trust that if things are feeling right and working for you then you are probably doing okay.
5. It’s normal to lose some good friends when you enter into a relationship
It’s true that your time will be more thinly spread between seeing the people who love however this doesn’t mean you need to lose those close to you. If you find yourself not being willing to invest the time into these friendships and excusing it on your new relationship then this says more about your view towards these people.
Furthermore, unless they have given you good reason to, don’t turn your back on friends who have been there for you just because your partner doesn’t like them.
6. I have to know what I want
We are all learning and we are all making mistakes. It doesn’t matter if you are 18 or 38 or 68 – rarely any of us are completely sure about what we want in a partner or a relationship until we have experienced it. Therefore, don’t feel pressurised to know exactly what you want by those around you, society’s expectations or even your partner.
You are allowed to explore and discover – in fact, we encourage it! And if your other half isn’t on-board, well then you already know one characteristic you don’t want in a relationship.
Also read: Should you kiss on the first date?
7. Why do they get all the luck?
We can’t help it but we compare ourselves to others all the time. However, whatever that one person has doesn’t mean you won’t also receive the same in due course. Everyone’s lives work on different timescales and rather than feeling bitter, keep moving forward. Besides, everyone has issues and stuff going on, we can never fully know what someone is going through.