If you’re reading this, it’s probably because you believe online dating doesn’t work and chances are you want to understand why it doesn’t.
If you’re looking for a miracle answer, you might just stop reading. I’m not here to support the claim made on the title of this article.
I’m here to tell you a hard truth. If so far you’ve felt online dating doesn’t work for you, I bet it’s your own fault.
So if you feel it doesn’t work, keep reading and check out why it can work for you, just like it does for thousands others.
You need perseverance
So often I see people saying “I’m tired of online dating, nothing happens, I’ve been using a site for a month and got no results”. Well, let me tell you, like almost all good things in life, to succeed you need to put effort and not just sit and wait.
Online dating is all about using the internet to take the first steps on connecting with someone you might eventually love. Most of the times, love doesn’t come easy, so please don’t blame online dating, blame life.
You need to review your attitude
When people go to online dating and start exploring a dating site, they often think “this is rubbish. There’s no one attractive, friendly or good enough for me”.
Stop thinking things aren’t going to work, just have a positive attitude and allow yourself to communicate with all sorts of people. You need to be communicative, endeavour in conversations, allowing others to find out more about you, while you do the same.
You have to choose the right site
Some dating sites aren’t great, others are ok and some can be awful. This can change depending on your requirements and expectations. What works for others, might not work for you.
Make sure you do your research prior to joining dating sites. The more you learn about available choices, the better chances you have to find the best dating site for you.
You can always build a small list of your top requirements and see which dating service can match them.
Stop being excessively picky
If you go online thinking “I’d better find someone who can tick dozens of requisites”, you are on the way to disaster. You need to get closer to people and date, online dating is an excellent gateway to meet people in the real world, it’s not a ‘genius in a bottle’ waiting to satisfy your wishes.
Give someone a chance, listen to what they have to say and be open to divert from your expected type. Where love comes from it’s something you need to stop controlling, most of the time you’ll find yourself in an odd situation. Trying to find the perfect one isn’t a smart thing to do.
See it as a starting step
If you look at online dating as a one click and make love happen kind of services, you’ll never be happy with it, because it’s not what it is.
Online dating is all about getting you closer to other people looking for the same thing as you. Thankfully, we still rely on the real world experiences to find and explore love.
Don’t expect online dating to do everything for you, it won’t. Invest time and see it as the first step into dating people and taking you closer to finding someone.
Ok, now make it work
It’s time to make it work, so stop winning and moaning and go for it.
There’s a reason for online dating being hugely popular. It works and makes it so simpler to communicate with others. It’s a tool for the 21st century and it’s here to stay.
You can always feel and argue it’s not for you. Of course you can, I’m not here preaching we should all use and like online dating. The point is, if you don’t like it, make sure it’s for the right reasons. Don’t blame online dating for your failures, don’t feel it’s something that just work for others, because it’s not.
If you find time, go with a fresh and open mind, you’ll have great chances of meeting someone you like by using online dating. Can you do it other ways? Sure you can, but it might take way more time and effort and limit your reach a lot.
The greatest thing about online dating is exactly its popularity, you can be sure to find all kinds of people and therefore be sure to find one for you.
If you don’t like online dating, ask yourself why and try to realise if you might be the one responsible for not having a good outcome. Most of the times, you can only blame yourself, so fix it.
When you tried online dating several times, for several reasons, with different approaches and nothing worked. Fine, it’s not for you. You’re just a hopeless case and maybe meeting someone at a local coffee shop works best.
Whatever the case, online dating offers more chances of meeting more people and more diverse. Online you’ll find an almost infinite number of opportunities. It’s exciting and worthwhile.
If you can’t take any positive outcome of dating online, how can you make it in the real world? If that’s you, good luck.
I prefer the real world and hope most of us do too, but the internet brought a new dimension to finding love. We shouldn’t ignore it.