The first thing that is probably important to mention is this: ignore most articles you read about this topic. Of course, this piece is one of the few exceptions but the majority of the advice you read contains a series of cringe-worthy and not very helpful one liners.
When the number one ‘sweet thing to say’ is ‘Your word is my favourite sound, your name is my favourite word, your hug is my favourite site’ then you probably shouldn’t read any further – that kind of chat is not going to work out for you.
The aim of every and any ‘sweet’ thing you say to a girl should be to show that you care. If this is present in the subtext, then you are on the right tracks. However, this article will break down to you some of the ways you can show you care.
The early days
Mention a topic she talked about recently – For example, if she mentioned she’s interested in trying out for the local theatre company then a few weeks later, ask her about it. Say you’ve looked it up; even send her a link to push her to do it. While this is a very specific scenario, mentioning anything she’s talked to you about speaks volumes because it shows you listen.
The Future – Now there is a fine line when it comes to this (basically, don’t be too keen) but do mention that you would be interested in meeting up again or watching that movie that you can’t believe she’s never seen. It doesn’t even need to be a definite plan as it just shows that you like where this is going however you get bonus points for booking that next date in.
Questions – Asking about her, no matter the question, is brilliant because it shows that you are interested. It can be tiresome if you just talk about yourself and that will definitely not endear you to her so make sure you seem keen to find out more about her life.
Flirting – This creates a sexual vibe that lets her know you see her as more than just a friend. To break it down, flirting is generally: gentle teasing and then complimenting her, eye-contact, being tactile, mentioning parts about her that you like.
Compliments – Complimenting a girl can go a long way. These show that you are noticing how she looks or acts and are paying attention. The best ones are of the personal variety so she knows that you aren’t just spewing generic lines. To help, some areas to focus on are: if she has a passion and shows it to you then compliment her performance (e.g. sings); compliment anything to do with her smile, eyes or her least favourite feature; compliment her on her quirky laugh or the way she can’t pronounce her ‘s’ – anything that is cute but personal goes down well. If you can’t think of anything to compliment her on…well, then you probably shouldn’t be going out.
Gift – Not a ‘saying’ but a gift is a great way to show you care. This can either be: 1) something cute and easy like flowers that you picked up on your way to hers just because. 2) Something special and personal e.g. you saw the tickets go on sale for her favourite band.
Simple – Mention that you appreciate her company. Yes, it is that simple but sometimes after going out for x amount of months, you can forget to mention the small things.
She’s been accepted – Whether it’s the parents, friends, siblings (even the dog) a girl likes to know that the special people in your life have welcomed her in. Even just mentioning that they like her or are excited to see her again will be a great boost to her confidence.
Checking up – Whether this is through texts, little post-it notes around the house or in person, a question just to see if she’s doing okay and that she is having a great day is a great way to show you care.
Support – If you are in a relationship then she will probably let you know when she’s feeling stressed or when something big is happening in her life. It is really important in these moments to remind her that you are in her corner and you have her back no matter what. Whatever she is worried about, she has got this and you just need to remind her now and again.
Choose her over something else – Boys night out or takeaway with her? Drinks in the pub or a date to the Shard? Whatever it is, have moments when you choose to spend time with her than another social activity you were invited to. You don’t even have to want to go to the other option; just making it look like you put her first goes a long way.
Date – Sometimes people forget to make the effort when they have been going out for a while – don’t be one of them. Surprise her by making an effort and planning an evening or day out that she will love.