There are plenty ways of learning about dating, but we believe sharing real life experiences and experiments is the best way to go. That’s why we are happy to have a womanizer writing for us, helping you in your pursue of love. If you want to skip our views on what a womanizer is and learn more about him, check this page or his posts.
How to define a womanizer?
It’s not an easy answer. Even Wikipedia doesn’t have a full dedicated page for the word “womanizer”. Instead they have a short definition saying: “a promiscuous heterosexual man”. (They do have a dedicated page for Britney Spears song with that title).
We can’t quite agree with that definition. It’s quite simplistic and mentioning just “promiscuous” doesn’t tell much. The definition for promiscuous comes as: “demonstrating or implying an unselective approach; indiscriminate or casual”. While it’s true a womanizer won’t stop approaching new women and in most cases for casual sex, there’s still more to it.
Other definitions can be found online and most of them focus on denigrating the term, e.g., Google shows one from vocabulary.com.
We at the OnDatingHub prefer to define a womanizer as
A man who constantly and consistently pursues non lasting relationships with several women at the same time; prefers to court several women rather than keeping a monogamous relationship; focus on immediate pleasures of courting and sex, disregarding long lasting feelings.
We know this isn’t a perfect definition, but we also know this covers the most important trait of a womanizer. He’s a man who wittingly decides to pursue several women.
Our in house womanizer is the perfect example of a man who has several women. This is something to expect from any womanizer, but there’s something that makes him different from most womanizers, the fact he makes an effort to build something positive out of the woman he dates, treating them with respect and having way more than just sex.
In most cases, we know a womanizer is just a ‘true player’, constantly looking for the victim to fall for their seduction game. We don’t particularly advocate this persona.
Womanizers are seen as lacking respect for women and traditionally just seeing women as ‘sex objects’ where each new one represents a conquest to feed ego and share triumph with mates.
The negative connotation of a womanizer is something Ciro Adessi can’t avoid. Most modern societies promote monogamy and we also feel that’s the best way to find true love and build a happy and long lasting relationship.
However we do respect variety and it’s good to see that, to some extent, it’s possible to respect a woman even being a womanizer.
He adds invaluable value to our team by sharing real life experience. Both men and women can learn a lot from him, ultimately helping to find confidence and take the right steps to find love. Women can finally see from the eyes of a womanizer who values them.
We invite you to check out what he has been posting.
And make sure you read below his very own opinion on womanizers.
The man himself
Hi, Ciro Adessi here,
I have to start by saying (and admitting) most womanizers tend to see women as objects. Why? Because they ‘play games’ with women all the time, for them it’s all about getting into the next girl panties.
Each time a womanizer gets a new girl, he get’s an empowering feeling, leaving him no option but to feel he’s on top of the game and the girl has just been used. After sex his game is over and it’s time to move on to the next prey.
This is a simplistic way of looking at things, but serves the purpose to explain I don’t see myself as that traditional womanizer. I don’t date girls to feed ego or brag to friends about how many girls I’ve got, which I don’t. I do it because I like women and so far I’m not keen on having just one serious relationship.
Silly? Maybe and I’m used to take judgments. I’ve had serious relationships in the past and those were definitely happy days. So why did I became a womanizer then?
How I turned into a womanizer
Whilst having a girlfriend I did felt something I wasn’t quite happy with. After building that strong relationship we had each other almost all the time, but not much apart from that. After a while we where getting along so well, we were happy to do all kinds of things together. But not quite all things.
I started saying ‘no’ to my friends a lot and I started realizing I wanted to say ‘yes’ most of the times. I rejected invitations to those last minute trips with all the mates, where we would go somewhere just to surf, relax and do what boys do.
Whilst having a girl by my side was great, I was more settled and comfortable with the relationship, then fulfilled or excited. There was nothing wrong with that, but I decided that wasn’t for me anymore. At least, not for now.
I wanted true freedom, the one which allows me to go on a weekend with my best friend without having to convince my other half. And to be fair she did allowed me to go on several trips, but on my mind I was worried about how she felt and also how I really wanted to enjoy more freedom. Didn’t seem fair.
So, I’ve ended up my long term relationship and after a while started saying ‘yes’ to almost all invitations. It felt great and I didn’t want to go back.
I didn’t realize I was a womanizer until close friends started saying I was dating lots of girls. At that point I had to see it as I was actually meeting and dating lots of girls. I was only looking at it as socializing, but for some part it was more than just that.
I don’t keep my social life as busy as it was years ago. Since moving to London, things shifted a lot in my life. Unlike those years back in my home country, when I moved I wanted to focus more on work and partying wasn’t on top of the things to do.
I now focus a lot on balancing work, socializing and dating, which all combined take a lot of my time. Online dating has allowed me to be much more time efficient.
Am I happy?
Yes, and one of the reasons for me to be happy is the fact I actually care a lot about people and women are no exception.
I rarely have arguments with women and can’t remember the last time I didn’t care about a girl after sex. If I have sex with someone, it’s because there’s more than just a physical attraction. I only keep dating girls I get along with.
Still, I’m womanizer and have to live with the bad connotations. But I also admit one day I’ll be happily going back to having a girlfriend. Not just yet.
I’m here to help you understanding more about relationships, dating and love. I won’t be here chatting about how to pick up girls or sell the guru talk about how to find love. I’ll share what I’ve learned and keep learning from my experiences.
You can learn more about me here and read my posts.