Whether you’re you want to boost your success of an existing profile, or you would like to know if online dating is for you, or just want to give it a good start, you came to the right place. Our team of experts has created a quick guide to leave you on the right track. After reading this you’ll be better prepared to succeed in online dating. Start reading and taking action. Good luck.
Some important facts you should know about online dating.
Despite most online dating websites claiming good men to women ratios, the fact is, you’ll find much more men than women in any dating website. Good start, you’ll have plenty to choose from.
No picture, no lucky. Competition is thought and don’t think you’ll get anything without, at least, sowing your face. Studies show, by using a pictures you increase your response rate by over 70%.
Plenty of men will be looking for casual dating and fun (even if they normally don’t assume it on their profile).
Women definitely have the power. With online dating you can expect to be approached by a substantial number of men.
Let’s Get Started
And where should you start?
We suggest you organize your ideas and plan before starting choosing a website and creating a profile. You should start by thinking how will you describe yourself and focus on your objective. If you are looking for a long term relationship, you need to keep in mind when you create a profile, the same goes for other objectives.
Write down a small text or bullet points about you and what you like in men. Meeting with a friend is a good thing to do at this stage, no one better to help you with your profile than a close friend.
After having some good notes, you’re ready to proceed.
Choosing the right online dating website for you
This step is probably the most important of them all. It’s vital you choose the right service for your needs. By missing this you might end up with a bad overall experience and miss a great opportunity.
When choosing the website, always keep in mind what type of relation you are looking for, whilst most of the cases dating websites focus on singles looking for love, this isn’t always the case. Make sure the website you are joining has the right features for you and also matches what you are looking for, e.g., casual dating, long term relationship, etc.
Unsure of what website is good for you? Take our 2min Quiz to find out.
Creating a profile
If you know now what you want from online dating, the type of men you are looking and have that content to add to your profile, you’re ready to go. Of course, grab your photos and be prepared to make a selection.
Keep it simple and real. We all know women don’t tend to lie as much as men when it comes to talking about themselves. So if you are part of the vast majority that feel lying isn’t the best thing to do, you are on the right track. Be as honest as possible.
The title sentence is an important one. We suggest you use to say something that can describe you, for e.g., “work hard, play hard girl who loves to travel”. Choosing your best features is always another smart option.
What is very important to have in mind when writing a profile is to understand how you will look through men eyes. You have to be especially careful if you are looking for a serious relationship. If you want a boyfriend, you have to be chary not to portrait yourself as someone who might be looking for something else. Writing something like “I love to meet new men” won’t help much on finding a serious partner.
Don’t give away much information, especially if you are confident about yourself and your profile pictures, you don’t need to write a lot to drive men attention. Write the essential and again, if you are a beautiful confident woman you can take the chance to write on the profile what you like and dislike in men. Yes, most of the time women have enough power to do that. By doing this, you are avoiding ‘time wasters’ and men you simply don’t fancy.
All profiles will ask you several question, whether it’s about your hobbies, favourite movies, books, etc. Once again, when it comes to body attributes, be honest. Sometimes women find it hard to tell what figure or shape they have, if that’s your case, just call a friend and ask.
In some occasions the website may ask your income level. We suggest you don’t answer to that, as you probably don’t want it to be part of the decision to contact you.
You can’t neglect this step. As in real life, appearance counts the most as a first impression, so the question is “what photos to post?”.
Normally most people say, use photos with a smile. We don’t disagree, but we prefer to leave some room for other options. If you’re not the type of woman who smiles that much, or if you simply prefer photos where you don’t smile, go for it. Following the same line of thinking used when writing your profile, you should try to show yourself. If you don’t tend to smile much, or if you prefer a shy smile instead of a big one, you should stay loyal to who you are.
What you can’t do, is post photos that show you angry, mad, sad, etc. You have to look positive on your photos. No men will fall in love with pictures of a ‘looking depressed’ woman.
You’ll need to have, at least, one face photo, and we don’t mean a photo where your face looks like is miles away from the camera. We suggest you use a face photo to use as profile picture.
When it comes to quantity, the more the merrier (with a sensible limit), but make sure you post 3 at least and show both body and face.
As a woman you have to remember that photos will portrait you, so be very careful with your chosen photos. If you are looking to attract serious men, posting a bikini photo isn’t very clever. Men will look at your pictures and immediately try to imagine the type of woman you are. The more provocative your photos are, the more men will think you are an “easy woman”.
That said, we suggest you avoid very provocative photos, unless you don’t mind being approach by hundreds of men with all kinds of intentions.
Another important subject is group photos. We see it so often, people posting photos with friends and family around. Please, don’t forget this is a personal profile at it should stay that way. Avoid placing photos with other people and if you do so, ask for their consent.
Make sure you add recent photos, we know you have those fantastic pictures from that trip 2 years ago, but that’s not the best way to show how you look at present.
On the description you can add date, it’s always good to show it’s a recent photo.
And to finalise, don’t use low quality photos.
Getting in touch
Note: If you don’t own a full membership you’ll now realise you can’t send message or get in touch with other members (that’s the case for most sites). Take our 2min quiz to know what’s the right site for you.
As woman at this stage you probably will start receiving messages, winks, gifts, etc. Well, at this stage you need time and it’s good to have a clear idea on what you want from a man.
Searching for the right one
On any website there’s always a search engine, where normally you have a great amount of filters to choose. Make sure you make good use of them, the less filters you use the more generic your results will be and the less chances of finding the right man for you.
Also, as a woman you can expect to be approached by many men, so also take some time and see what they have to tell you. You may not need to contact that many man yourself.
Sending Winks, Gifts, Kisses, etc.
In most cases there is more than one way to approach man, but the most commons are messages and winks. We believe women are fine by using any of them, but if you find a man you really fancy, a message is the best option. Winks are many often over used and they tend not to carry much meaning.
As a confident woman we believe you are, you don’t need to out and send many messages or winks, take time to read the ones you receive.
Good news for you. Women don’t need to put much effort to get attention from men. Yes, some nice photos will do most work for you. Men are mostly looking for good looking women and they struggle to get your attention, so you are in control here.
Now that you received a handful of messages, the best thing to do it to take some time and have a look at them. Depending on the volume of messages you receive and the time you have for online dating, there’s a chance you won’t have time to read every single message. If that’s the case, we suggest you delete messages from man you don’t fancy straight away. As much shallow this might look, the reality is you probably won’t go anywhere with a man you don’t find attractive, so this might save you some time.
Another thing is responding to man you don’t think is the right for you, but doing it for politeness or pity. We have one thing to say about this, “don’t do it”, you’ll just create false hopes and you might even end up with a ‘virtual stalker’. If you don’t fancy him, just ignore his approach.
Also, be prepared to receive weird messages from man, yes man in online dating can be really pervert and act weirdly. If you spot a message you find offensive, delete the message. If it gets too much, you can also block and report that user.
And you have the simple task of just picking the ones you like and respond to them.
Even if you get many messages, we won’t suggest you neglect searching for man and making some approaches yourself. Sometimes you might find the right one by doing so. But one thing is for sure, a good looking woman won’t need to do many approaches to have plenty of man to choose from.
Once you started talking to some man you initially liked, now it’s just the case of telling more about yourself and asking more about him to see if there’s more than just initial spark.
When you feel confident you found a man you might like and the conversation is going well, if you weren’t invited for a date yet, the chances are it’s going to happen soon. If you like to take charge, you can always suggest a date in your chosen place and time.
Get a date
After spending some time talking to men you feel might be the right for you, it’s time to take the next step and actually meet some of them.
Don’t rush things and see how conversation is going. If your online chat is going well, it’s going to be obvious you both want to meet and normally sooner than later you’ll receive and invite.
It might be the case you fancy the shy type and he doesn’t make the move. If you don’t mind taking charge, go ahead and let him know it’s time to meet for real.
The first date
This is the time for you to impress him, so make sure you prepare yourself to be on your best.
At this stage you’re probably following his lead as he was the one inviting you to go on a date. If that’s the case, make sure you know exactly the place where you’ll meet. A public and well known place to you it’s vital to keep things safe. Avoid going for surprises or unusual requests on a first date. Remember, as much as you like him, it has been only an online chat so far.
Assuming you already took into consideration the safety side of things and you’re actually meeting him, there are a couple of things to keep in mind.
As we said before, be yourself and honest. Don’t try to be something you’re not and avoid exaggerations. Drinking too much or losing control won’t look good on a first date.
One of the most commons things that happen on a first date is awkward silence. It’s something we all want to avoid, but happen so often. Don’t panic if there’s some silence, that’s normally part of the process of knowing someone. It’s common to see people who chatted so much online that they don’t know what more to ask in person.
Just be prepared for the silence and have something in mind to avoid it. Remember, there’s always something to talk about, whether it’s a trip you’ve done or a funny moment at work, anything can be an icebreaker. Use your imagination and don’t feel the pressure to talk too much. Do it in a natural way.
We have to talk about bad dates. The truth is, there is a good chance you ended having a bad date one day. When it comes, please don’t make it worst. One of the common mistakes is people trying to make obvious they are having a bad date. That’s not something we recommend. If the chemistry isn’t there that doesn’t mean it’s anyone’s fault. Those things happen and you should look at it in a positive way. That’s part of the process of trying to find the right one.
Sooner or later you’ll have that amazing date which leads to another one and something more after a while. That’s what we want you to achieve soon.
If a man isn’t for you, don’t ruin the experience by showing it. Don’t be rude just because it’s not going well. You can always say you’re tired and it’s time for you to go, but do it in a polite way.
Always be positive, look on the bright side and you’ll soon find love.